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Words By Tara Wagner

10 Signs of a Self-Confident Woman

Tara smiling with a glass of wine in her kitchen

In this blog, I am sharing 10 signs of a self-confident woman, including some things that confident people donโ€™t do.

Watch here or read below.

Ten Signs Of A Self-Confident Woman. Share on X

Today we are talking about confidence, specifically, the signs that I have seen both in myself, in my own journey from crippling self-doubt to really just liking myself and approving of what Iโ€™m doing, as well as what Iโ€™ve seen in my clients as theyโ€™ve made that same journey.

This isnโ€™t an exhaustive list, but it is the things that Iโ€™ve seen over and over.

What I want you to do in the comments is to write out the number 1 โ€“ 10,  and Iโ€™m going to have you take notes on whether or not youโ€™re โ€œnailing itโ€, โ€œworking on itโ€, or maybe โ€œtotally floppingโ€ right now.

The reason that I want you to do this actually ties into the first of these 10 signs of  a self-confident woman.

SIGN #1: SHE ADMITS HER WEAKNESSES  AND HER MISTAKES

One of the first signs of a self-confident woman is that sheโ€™s not afraid to admit both her mistakes and her weaknesses.

Self-confidence is really about liking yourself and approving of yourself. If you like and approve of yourself youโ€™re not going to worry about making a mistake or doing something wrong because you know that it doesnโ€™t make who you are wrong.

SIGN #2: SHE TAKES CARE OF HERSELF

Number two, she takes care of herself and she does it without apologizing and without justifying her actions or her needs.

A confident woman knows that her needs are legitimate and that she has value and worth, and that itโ€™s okay to take time out for herself every single day, every single week, and maybe even every single month or every quarter to meet those needs.

And because she knows that she is inherently worthy and inherently valuable, she feels no need to justify that to other people or explain or apologize to people as to why she canโ€™t do what they want her to do because she needs to first take care of herself.

SIGN #3: SHE SAYS โ€œI DONโ€™T KNOWโ€ WITH EASE

Number three, she doesnโ€™t feel awkward about saying โ€œI donโ€™t know.โ€

This comes from my own personal experiences. I used to have such a hard time not having all of the answers and feeling like to be worthy or to be good enough I had to know everything.

But you know what? A lack of knowledge doesnโ€™t indicate a lack of self-worth.

A lack of knowledge doesn't indicate a lack of self-worth. (Tara Wagner) Share on X

Itโ€™s impossible for any of us to know everything, or to have our hands in everything, or to have read every book, or to know every person out there.

Itโ€™s actually okay for us to say โ€œI donโ€™t know.โ€

When youโ€™re confident in yourself and you know your self-worth, you donโ€™t feel uncomfortable saying that anymore. Because, again, you know that a lack of knowledge or experience with something doesnโ€™t correlate to your self-worth.

woman walking drinking coffee
SIGN #4: SHEโ€™LL GO PLACES WITHOUT MAKEUP

Number four, she will go places without makeup on.

I think thatโ€™s about all I have to say about that one. 

SIGN #5 OF A CONFIDENT WOMAN: SHE LAUGHS AT HERSELF

Number five is she laughs at herself.

She doesnโ€™t take herself too seriously because sheโ€™s not sitting here criticizing and analyzing every stinking thing she is doing.

So when she doesnโ€™t know something, or when she has a weakness, or when she makes a mistake, or when she goes to the grocery store without makeup on and runs into the most influential person she could ever want to meet, she can laugh about it because she knows that itโ€™s really not that big of a deal. And, again, it doesnโ€™t relate to who she is.

SIGN #6: SHE DOESNโ€™T CARE WHAT OTHERS THINK

Number six, and this is a biggie and it takes a lot of time and practice to get here, but she doesnโ€™t care what other people think.

Now, this doesnโ€™t mean that she doesnโ€™t value their opinions or that other people donโ€™t matter; she just knows that the first thing that matters is what she thinks of herself, and if sheโ€™s loving and approving of herself, she no longer needs other people to love and approve of her.

A confident woman doesn't care what others think. She still values other's opinions, but she knows the first thing that matters is what she thinks of herself. (Tara Wagner) Share on X

You will know that you love and approve of yourself by how much validation youโ€™re looking for in your likes, in your comments, and in the praise that youโ€™re getting from other people.

If you love what youโ€™re doing, you believe in yourself, and you feel good about who you are, youโ€™re no longer going to worry about the people who may not view you the same way because you donโ€™t need them to anymore.

SIGN #7: SHE DOESNโ€™T TALK SMACK

The seventh sign of a confident woman is that she will not criticize or gossip about other women.

In fact, she will usually even stop it from happening in her presence.

This is because if you feel good about who you are, you have no desire to tear other people down.

Itโ€™s only hurting people that hurt people. And, likewise, it is only self-critical people that criticize others.

It's only hurting people that hurt people. And, likewise, it is only self-critical people that criticize others. (Tara Wagner) Share on X
SIGN #8 OF A CONFIDENT WOMAN: SHE LIFTS OTHERS UP

Sign #7 ties into sign #8, which is if sheโ€™s not tearing people down itโ€™s because sheโ€™s busy lifting others up.

This is because when you feel good about who you are, youโ€™re no longer intimidated by the power, success, or the brightness of other people, in fact, you love it!

I have seen this time and time again in women who have gone from self-doubt or self-criticism to love and approval of who they are. They take others with them. Theyโ€™re excited, thereโ€™s so much love, light, and joy on their face, and they are encouraging others to do the same thing, to take the same path that they took.

women hanging out in greenhouse

SIGN #9: SHE TREATS OTHERS WITH RESPECT

And #8 also kind of leads into #9, which is she is treating other people with respect, even if they may not deserve it based on their own bad behavior at that moment.

Now, this doesnโ€™t mean that she doesnโ€™t have boundaries; homegirl has boundaries, but when you like yourself, trust me, you donโ€™t let anybody else harm you if youโ€™re not harming you first.

But even if somebody is disrespecting you, you still have self-respect, and so youโ€™re treating other people how you might want to be treated if you were having a really bad day, or acting out, or lashing out at somebody, knowing that theyโ€™re still humans, theyโ€™re going to make mistakes too.

You can have those boundaries and still be respectful to other people.

Youโ€™re doing this as much for yourself as you are for them. Because a person with self-respect wants to treat others kindly because of who they are, not because of who someone else is.

A person with self-respect wants to treat others kindly because of who they are, not because of who someone else is. (Tara Wagner) Share on X

This means that when you love yourself and you know that youโ€™re good enough, but somebody else comes up and tries to treat you as though youโ€™re not, if youโ€™re not still holding on to that place inside of yourself that says, โ€œI might not be good enough,โ€ their behavior is not going to bother you because you no longer have that sore spot. They canโ€™t push something that doesnโ€™t exist.

And when they try, because it doesnโ€™t exist, you donโ€™t feel the need to defend that or protect that sore spot because itโ€™s not there anymore.

You love yourself! You think youโ€™re amazing! You donโ€™t have a big ego, you know you have weaknesses, you know you make mistakes, you know you donโ€™t know everything, but you still like who you are and what youโ€™re here to do or what youโ€™re about.

So somebody that comes along and theyโ€™re being a total butthole to you, itโ€™s not going to bother you that much, youโ€™re going to be like, โ€œOkay, go on with your bad day.โ€ Itโ€™s just not going to be the thing that throws you off because they can only trigger you, again, if you hold a trigger.

Someone else can only trigger you if you hold a trigger. (Tara Wagner) Share on X
SIGN #10: SHE REALIZES SHE WONโ€™T ALWAYS FEEL CONFIDENT

Okay, I know Iโ€™m kind of up on my soapbox so let me come down just a little tiny bit and share with you the 10th sign of a self-confident woman.

She realizes that she wonโ€™t always feel confident, and she wonโ€™t always feel happy, and she might not always like everything sheโ€™s doing, and she might have moments where sheโ€™s criticizing herself, but that says nothing about WHO SHE IS.

And hereโ€™s what I mean by this:

Youโ€™re going to have bad days because youโ€™re human. But in the back of your mind, if youโ€™re truly in a healthy place, if youโ€™re truly loving and approving of yourself, youโ€™re always going to know that this is a bad day, not a bad life; that this is a bad moment, not a bad person.

Because when you really love yourself, you know that youโ€™re still going to be human and you approve and love of that aspect too.

A confident woman knows a bad day is not a bad life, and a bad moment doesn't make a bad person. (Tara Wagner) Share on X
IF YOU WANT TO START THE PROCESS (OR MAYBE EVEN JUST SMOOTH AND IMPROVE THE PROCESS) OF PERSONAL GROWTH, OF GETTING FROM THAT PLACE OF SELF-DOUBT TO SELF-CONFIDENCE, I WANT YOU TO GRAB MY BOTTLENECKS TO BREAKTHROUGHS TRAINING.

Itโ€™ll outline my exact Belief Breakthrough Process and show you the only five things you need to address to start doing things like gaining confidence.

Itโ€™s absolutely free, and you can get it by clicking the button below or clicking here for more details! 

WHAT ABOUT YOU, BOSS LADY?

I hope that you were taking notes so that you can drop those in the comments along with any other signs of a confident woman that youโ€™ve seen either in your own life or in the lives of other people that you truly admire.

Scroll down to leave your comments!

xoTara

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About the author

Picture of Tara Wagner
Tara Wagner
Iโ€™m Tara Wagner, creator of the Breakthrough Bossยฎ. I help small biz owners overcome burnout and create part-time schedules with full-time profits. Not with some new marketing strategy, but with a holistic approach to how you operate.
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