How to change your mindset (part 1) – let’s start with the 4 things you MUST HAVE if you want to learn how to develop a growth mindset quickly (and with fewer frustrations or flops along the way), so you can feel more confident, stay motivated, and make progress.
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“How do you actually change your mindset?”
That was a question that I asked years ago when my mindset caused me to lose my business, destroy my health, and almost take my family down with it. Now I’ve been teaching this since 2010, and I can tell you, there are 4 things you must have in place if you want to develop yourself, get past your fears, your blocks, your beliefs, be able to grow in confidence, and take the action that you’re wanting to take. Let’s talk about what those four things are.
What are the four things you must have in order to change your mindset, change your ability to take action, change the way you think and feel about things, change the way you show up or respond or react?
#1 – You need the right strategies
Number one, you must have the right strategies.
And I’m talking about strategies in two different ways. Yes, you obviously need the right mindset strategies (strategies that actually change a mindset). If you’re just throwing affirmations at it or dancing around in front of a mirror – though those things can be helpful, they might not actually change the way that you believe the way that you think and feel and are able to respond based on the old messaging that you picked up probably decades ago. So yes, that’s important, but also the strategies in your life, in your business, in the goals that you’re trying to achieve.
If you don’t have the right strategies, you can have a great mindset, but those wrong strategies are going to destroy that mindset.
So what are the areas in your life that you want to change your mindset for? Is it a goal you’re trying to reach? A health goal, a personal goal, relationship, goal, a financial goal, a business goal? What is it that you’re trying to do? If we don’t understand that it’s going to be hard to understand what are the strategies or tools that I need, or are the strategies and tools that I need or that I have now actually working for me?
If you were to sit down and look at the strategies and the tools that you have, do you know they’re going to work for you? Not just work in general, not just they’ve worked for other people, but do they fit your style, your personality, your values, and even your goals.
It is so common to try to throw solutions at something without making sure that those solutions actually align. So make sure you have the right mindset, tools and strategies, make sure you also have the right tools and strategies for the areas in your life that you’re trying to develop that mindset for.
#2 – You need the right community
Number two, you need the right community.
I think it was Jim Rohn that said, “We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with.” But that doesn’t just limit us to those five people. All of the communities that we surround ourselves in, the conversations, the mindsets, the approaches, the way that people believe, what they believe is possible. All of those things are going to influence what we can do because our brains have something called mirror neurons and mirror neurons just copy other people. Literally, that’s all they do.
Get yourself into the right communities, with the right people, doing the right things from the right frame of mind
If you find people who’ve got their hearts in the right place. They’re aligning with the mindset that you want to have you’re going to see the change in your mindset happens so much quicker.
However, if you’re in a toxic environment, if you’re in an environment with people who just don’t get it, they’re just not interested. They’re actively sabotaging you, or they’re just distracting you. They’re great people and you love them, but they’re going in a different direction. And they’re trying to pull you along with them. That’s going to make it very difficult to change your mindset.
What is the environment that you’re in? Look at those 5 people you spend the most time with, but also look at what are the podcasts that you listen to? The videos that you’re watching, the Facebook groups that you’re hanging out in. Well, who are the accountability partners in your life, the networking groups, the churches, the neighborhood parties, what are the places that you’re surrounding yourself in? And what can you do to better those communities? And by the way, if you need a better community, check out our Facebook group, the link is in the description.
So number one is getting the right tools and strategies. Number two is making sure that you’re immersing yourself in the right conversations and community to normalize the things that you’re trying to do so that you can be successful in actually doing them, changing your mindset so that you can change your actions.
#3 – You need the right mentoring
Number three, you need the right mentoring.
Mentoring can come in all shapes and sizes. It doesn’t have to be a coach like me. Although sometimes it needs to be, sometimes it needs to be a therapist. Sometimes it needs to be clergy. Sometimes it just needs to be a good friend or a mentor – just somebody who is going to take you under their wing and support you.
Why do you need this? Because you can’t see your own blind spots.
You can know that they are there, but you are still blind to them. If somebody is walking across the street and they cross in front of my blind spot, I’m not going to see them. I know the blind spots there, but I don’t know what’s behind it.
Just because you know what your blind spots are, what your weaknesses are. Doesn’t mean you’re able to spot them.
Somebody else on the outside with a different perspective, somebody who is 5, 10 steps ahead of you is going to be able to look and say, “watch out for that blind spot”, “look out for that pothole”, “you need to take a detour here”, “You know what? There’s really bad traffic on that road. Let’s go this direction instead”.
You need to have that type of mentoring, the type of change you want to see both changing your mindset or changing your life, changing your business, changing your financial situation.
Those things are going to be longer, harder, messier, more frustrating, and less likely to get there because you’re hitting all of these different things in the way: pedestrians on the sidewalk, potholes, traffic, whatever it might be that you wouldn’t have to hit otherwise, if you had somebody who was ahead of you on that road, looking back and giving you the support, the mentoring, the guidance, the handholding, the wisdom, the tips, the tools, the strategies, the community, whatever it might be, that’s going to help you get there faster.
So take it easy on yourself. Stop thinking you got to figure all this out yourself. That is actually not the case. Don’t try to reinvent the wheel, stand on the shoulders of giants and let them push you further than even they could get, right? Even your mentor should have mentors so that they’re continuing to grow.
If you think that there’s something wrong with you because you need support. The only thing wrong is that thought.
#4 – you need the right amount of consistency
Okay, so number four, you need the right amount of consistency.
I talk about consistency to everybody. And the #1 thing I hear is “well, I did try that, I was consistent”. And when I asked them, “okay, how long were you consistent for?” They would say 2 weeks, 4 weeks, or 3 months. Most cases, 3 months isn’t even enough.
If you really want to change your mindset or change anything else, you need to be consistent for at least a year.
Why is that? Because through that year, you’re going to have all kinds of obstacles, situations, circumstances, detours, anything that might come up, it’s probably going to come up in that year. And if you really want to know if your mindset is solid, you’re not going to know it in a couple of weeks. You’re not going to know it in a couple of months. You’re going to know it through testing it in a lot of different scenarios, scenarios that need time to develop, come up for you to be able to see, “Is my mindset actually solid? Am I actually seeing results?”.
So getting into those communities and staying there and engaging and being consistent in your engagement so that you can really start to see the change in your mindset, getting that mentoring and getting in there and engaging and doing the work and reaching out to them and sharing everything you possibly can because the more consistent you are with them and for the amount of time you’re doing so is going to make the difference. And then of course using the right tools and the right strategies over a longer period of time than what you think is necessary.
If you’re doing some affirmations and your mindset’s not changing. Yeah, that’s because your mindset was developed over a span of maybe minutes or moments or days or months, but then it was solidified over years, decades of time, 5 minutes of affirmations might make you feel good for a second, but it’s not going to be enough to really, to create the changes and see the changes that you’re wanting to make.
And if you’re an entrepreneur who needs, it’s the right tools…
…the right strategies, the right community, the right mentoring, and enough consistency to help you change both your mindset and your business and the trajectory that you’re going. Be sure to check out my Healthy Hustle Approach!
My free class, How to Use a Holistic Approach to Create a Profitable Business Without Burning Yourself Out will show you the 3 mistakes most small business owners are making and introduce you to the tools and strategies I teach to help you create a 6-figure business working less than 40 hours a week. If you’re interested, check out the free class, by clicking the button below.
What about you, boss lady?
I’d love to hear from you! Which of these 4 things do you have in your life and business?
Scroll down to leave your comments below.